Judges who don’t read the books they’re pronouncing on, movie critics who don’t see the films they’re writing about… it’s the new form of criticism, writes Alex Beam. “I am partaking in a hot new reviewing trend: Abstinence-Based Criticism (A-BC). At the key moment of critical engagement, just say no. Resist the temptation! Why read the book, see the movie, or, for that matter, eat the food? I can do it from here!”